Worst Timing
by FastForward
Summary: Oneshot of Kiba. I just think he has the worst timing ever... I don't know why...


**A/N: I've concluded that Kiba always shows up at the worst times. I've decided we need an inside view on what goes on in the brunette's head after such occurrences, don't you?**

**Note: I'm obsessed with Kiba, but you don't have to be to appreciate his mind. I heart Kiba. :huggles Kiba plushie, and then promptly wishes to actually _own_ a Kiba plushie:**

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**Worst Timing.**

My name is Kiba Inuzuka, and I am known to have the worst timing _ever_! I show up at the most inopportune moments, I kid you not.

There's only so many times someone can walk in on two of their best friends having sex before they start to wonder if God decided it would be funny to chose them as his form of entertainment.

Something goes wrong, I usually show up to see it and then get stuck helping to clean up said mess, or I get accused for it. If there's trouble, I usually show up to get my head shot off or my ass kicked. If my friends are having sex, I usually show up to talk to one of them and walk in on them doing the dirty.

Needless to say, I never go to Sasuke and Naruto's anymore.

But that's not the only bad timing I have, ladies and gentlemen, oh no! Every time I make a move on Hinata, something usually goes wrong.

Take our first date, for example. We went to a restaurant. We ordered our food, had a little chat, everything was going great. Then, as I reached across the table to take her hand, a waiter walked by, and spilled hot soup in my lap. I'd never heard anyone screech so high before, and I was embarrassed to realize it had come from me.

The next time, I was just about to kiss her outside her home—her cousin opened the door, slamming the wood in my face. I had to go to the hospital to get my nose fixed and find out if there was a way to get my two front teeth reinserted. I still don't believe Neji when he insists it was an accident. No one opens the door with that much force unless they want to cause damage.

It's gotten to the point where all I want to do is curl up into a little ball in the corner and not move for fear of my bad timing kicking in. Of course, I'd have to move to go to the bathroom or eat or something, and with my luck, I would do that at the worst time.

For example, if I headed to the bathroom, chances are I'd reach it right when my sister was walking out of it naked. _No guy wants to see his older sister naked, dammit! It scars you in ways no one can **begin** to imagine!_

And then, if I headed to get food, chances are it would be when some big virus was going around or something, and being who I am, I would be the only one to get it. Some weird Avian Flu or Mad Cow shit. I kid you not, that's just my luck.

Again, I ask you—why me? Why was I chosen to be the one to walk around and run into the worst things imaginable? _Don't tell me walking in on Naruto is Sasuke is **not** the worst thing imaginable, I will **beat** you!_ If you want to walk in on that-that—that _stuff_, then you can trade places with me! But just know that the good has a lot of bad with it.

Then again, if you're one who would _enjoy_ seeing Naruto and Sasuke do the dirty, if we traded luck, chances are you'd never catch them. Must be because I don't want to see it that I always do. Maybe I should change my opinion on it...

No, because everyone would know it wasn't true, so my luck wouldn't change. I'd still walk in on them. God, why me?.!

I wonder if I've done something to offend someone. Maybe someone cursed me—like a gypsy curse or something. Shit, maybe someone stole a lock of my hair while I was sleeping and put this curse on me! I'll be forever doomed to walk in at the worst times for everything!

No, calm down, Inuzuka, you're just thinking crazy now. Deep breaths, that's it. Everything's okay.

Don't laugh! It's not funny! I said it's not funny, stop laughing! Why do you all hate me so?.!

Wait a second...

It's you, isn't it? _You're_ the bloody one who cursed me! **Gah!** You people suck! I won't fall prey to your curse any longer! Watch me, I'll change! In fact, to prove I'll change, I'm going to head over to Naruto and Sasuke's _right now_! And you know what? I _won't_ walk in on them having sex!

All right, I'm thinking optimistically! I _won't_ walk in on Naruto and Sasuke! I won't! This time will be different! The curse of Kiba Izunuka is no longer in effect! I will prove it to you! Watch me go, I'll face those two bastards and they'll be talking or holding hands—but nothing more! The curse is _gone_!

Here I go!

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A/N: He walked in on them having sex. Kiba just can't win.**


End file.
